Monday, July 21, 2008

Dear Heidi Collins...

i watch CNN every morning as i get ready for work. i have enjoyed, for a long time now, the relatively un-biased, fair, and smart news reporting that goes on. they present the news with little or no unnecessary personal commentary or annoying banter and hollywood gossip that so many local morning "news" shows seem inundated with (especially here in LA)...however, of late, i have noticed a steep descent into the abyss of the local news reporter quality. meaning, the anchors on CNN seem to be getting stupider.

Heidi Collins is one of the many talented anchors on CNN's morning news show. she's pretty, generally intelligent, and usually does a good job. this is a woman who has interviewed political giants such as Donald Rumsfeld and Colin Powell. She has journalistic excellence awards and been nominated for Emmys. She was a huge part of the CNN news team during the capture of Saddam Hussein, and has worked extensively for Anderson Cooper (silver fooooooooooox). Apparently, she is also an expert in militay and aviation issues. all that said, i cannot overlook the decline in her general attitude over the past couple of months...

specifically, i can't stand her attitude towards stories that, i suppose, she doesn't consider to be "real" news. the under-handed jabs, the comments, the "banter" with fellow anchors and reporters that is supposed to be "witty" but instead reads as mean and petty.

for example: today, she and her fellow anchor, Tony Harris (lovely fellow, a bit chatty, but lovely) were covering the box office numbers for "mamma mia" and "the dark knight", which both opened to impressive showings this weekend. perhaps not the most significant news story of the day, what with wars, presedential elections, the olympics, a plunging economy, gas and oil prices, a global climate change crisis, amongst other notable topics, being on the agenda, but nevertheless, a full 15 minutes was devoted to the box office.

not only does ms. collins spend a fair chunk of that 15 minutes mocking mr. harris for seeing "mamma mia", she (and, to be fair, the reporter covering the story whose name escapes me also participated in this adventure) mocked the whole of the audience who saw "mamma mia". with comments and facial expressions. the general tone of her commentary was that seeing "mamma mia" is totally beneath her.

the classy train didn't stop rolling there, though. because next, the reporter shared with ms. collins and mr. harris that MANY of the attendees of screenings of "the dark knight" honored the occassion by dressing up in homage to heath ledger's joker. the reporter had pictures of these audience members. and ms. collins made fun of each and every one of them. they scared her. they freaked her out. they have too much time on their hands. they are ridiculous.

it was like watching the head cheerleader pick on the kids from the drama club. it was not fun to watch. it was rude, SNOTTY, and downright mean.

listen, i don't watch CNN for your personal commentary or opinions on movies, lady. or for your opinion on any PERSON who goes to see those movies.

it was irritating to me because i can GUARANTEE that most of HER audience went to see those movies this weekend. her attitude and behavior in presentation of stories affects how those stories are percieved and received by her audience, and she needs to keep that in mind and adjust her attitude.

i mean, it's CNN, for god's your news. she's not even giving an opinion on the movie (which she hadn't seen), she's just making fun of her own audience.

if i want biased and judgemental reporting, i would watch Fox News, and if i want insignificant and frivolous prattle, i would watch the Today show...or Regis and Kelly... i want none of that, which is why i watch CNN.

report on the box office numbers, if you must, and then move on to Iraq, the presidential election, the economy (yes, i understand that the economy, especially our local economy, is greatly impacted by / interested in the box office), the olympics, anything.

but shut up about what you think about joe-schmoe who was so freaking excited about "the dark knight" that he wanted to pay homage by dressing up.

Adjust your attitude, Heidi. It's not attractive and does not do your obvious intelligence justice.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

season 5

is it just me, or are the majority of the contestants on the new season of Project Runway just awful? 

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

listen to me!

i have a ridiculous obsession with platform shoes.

this obsession has plagued me since long before the recent fad of designer platform spike heels in neon and crayon-hued colors that are great for both weekend bar-hopping AND for climbing corporate ladders at the office (seriously, how can you NOT respect a woman in pin-stripes and D&G stilettos?) burst forth upon the scene (a fad in which i have happily partaken).

it has plagued me in an almost cruelly subversive way, by creeping into my mind as i shop for shoes (while holding a perfectly pretty and sensible heel with no platform in one hand, and a monster of a platform, with buckles and peep-toes and a contrasting platform - but NEVER in cork - i will invariably be drawn to the platform, eschewing the pretty and sensible heel for an overwhelming urge to tower over every living thing within a five-mile radius).

but why? how? when?

well, i can answer those questions...i can trace the obsession to it's very roots.

it started in high school. junior year to be exact. at the time, i did have a "look"...i had a bizarre collection of anything that i thought looked "surfer" or "preppy"...two looks that do NOT go together. oh how the epic battle between the gap and roxy raged in my high school closet. but, in a single moment, i found what i believed was the most perfect opportunity to blend those looks.

the platform flip-flop.

the 4" platform flip-flop.

the red 4" platform flip-flop.

i wore those suckers every day. not only did i feel, very deeply, that they effortlessly blended my inner surfer with the black capris and cardigan that was one of my favorite outfits, but i discovered the TRUE reason why designers have long tortured women's feet with platforms and heels of all shapes and sizes.

they make your legs look bangin'. and really, really long.

in no way, as a 17-year-old girl, did i need to be making my legs "look bangin'." OR really, really long for that matter. at that age, i had already reached my maximum height, which was well above average, and was consequently taller than almost any male at my high school. that fact remains true to this day. nevertheless, i was in love with those platform flip-flops, and a version or two of them would be with me until well into my senior year of college.

This was my first foray into platform college, the obsession grew to include platform boots (ankle, calf, and knee), platform clogs, platform slides, platform strappy sandals, the inevitable (and still glorious) platform wedge, and the Nirvana to my Viking: platform sneakers.

now, this was before i really understood the concept of developing a "shoe budget" for myself. i believed that quantity outstripped quality in terms of importance, and so I took to the DSWs, Shoe Pavillions, and Famous Footwears of the Greater Los Angeles area in search on anything i could put on my feet that would make my legs look longer. I've since discovered that they have really great shoes and deals at these stores, but at the time, my eyes were only for anything platform and hideously ugly.

back to the sneakers.

i cannot, for the life of me, remember what possesed me to purchase these platform sneakers. I bought them on Melrose Avenue, in one of those stores that kind-of-sort-of-maybe sells black market knock-offs of things like Dickies jackets. i was with a group of my quasi-goth friends (it would be easy to blame this on them...but it would be a lie), and i remember one of them buying a floor-length black suede jacket with safety pins holding it together on the sides, with a distinctive dragon pattern stitched in silver thread on the back. the jacket cost $400.

the sneakers cost about $30. they had black suede uppers, with black rubber soles of a height measuring 2". black laces. the soles had a single thick red stripe. on the sides of the shoes, right where you would see a Nike swish or Adidas triple line...on each side...bright red, orange, and yellow flames. that's right. big, bright, obnoxious flames. they went perfectly with the uniform i was required to wear at the restaurant i worked at, and were the perfect balance between leggy excellence i sought in platforms, and the "hard-core rocker" attitude i wanted everyone to perceive me.

it goes without saying that no one, outside of the four friends i was with at the time of purchase, thought they were that cool.

after a while, i didn't think they were that cool either...but the novelty never wore off. after i quite the restaurant job, i wore them for a couple of halloweens, as a joke...but, maybe it felt dishonest to be joking about something i had once been so excited about...long after i'd grown out of my platform boots and flip-flop phase and into the strappy, peep-toe, platform pump part of my adult life, for some reason, the be-flamed platform sneakers stayed in my closet.

until this past weekend, when, as i went to go add my latest (platform, slingback, black) purchase to the closet, i realized that something had to give...and i didn't want it to the structural support of my shoe, along with a 10-year-old pair of running shoes and a pair of aged black Steve Madden pumps, the platform flame sneakers found their way to the good will pile...

adieu, sweet friends...

photo to come...